Friday, January 28, 2011

Off-topic Friday: Rick Ross tries to remember what geese are called.

Why yes, that IS my head. I'm wearing my head.
So this has basically zilch to do with the topic of this blog, but I've been sort of obsessed lately with Rick Ross. Not the famous drug dealer, but the Miami rapper who borrowed his name. Now, I know that Ross' schtick is vaguely ludicrous: he raps mainly about being a big-time drug dealer and spending insane amounts of money. He's actually a former prison guard; it's not clear if he's ever sold a kilo of coke.

But somehow I can't stop listening to him. The songs of his that are currently on heavy rotation in my apartment (and in my head) are BMF (Blowin' Money Fast) and MC Hammer off his latest album. They're essentually two versions of the same song with different lyrics. The first is, well, about selling dope. And spending insane amounts of money. The second is about being ... MC Hammer. And selling dope. And spending insane amounts of money. It contains the following couplet:

I got 30 cars, whole lot of dancers
I take them everywhere, I'm MC Hammer

But that's not what I'm here to tell you about. What I do want to bring to your attention is an interview with him I ran across on It's, well, a little odd. Consider this exchange:

How's life in Miami?

Rick Ross : Ah, it’s wonderful. I’m currently in New York City, it’s 20 degrees… it feels like it. My nose feels like it. But two days ago I was in my briefs, in the pool, palm trees, I saw like -- not ducks flying over me, but something else. Some other… amphibian… yeah, they be flying over me. Not like a duck or a bird, but something else. Them long-necked things. Geese. Yeah, geese. They look fly when you fly by, you know what I mean?

Well, I suppose technically speaking, geese are amphibious: that is, they can function in water or on land. I'm pretty sure they're birds, though.

Later in the interview he notes how much he loves "that smoke for my mind. I love that smoke for my mind, you know? It inspires me."

Yeah, dude. We can tell.


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  1. Hey since we are off topic-I was quoted in today's NYTimes! But unfortunately they did not attribute me by name. :(

    Still, neat!

  2. This is so hilarious. Maybe a good way to take a break if you should ever run out of kitty pics! (But then again, you're a cat owner, so...)

    So, would you recommend this guy's music? I mean, reading this about a musician usually makes me rather sceptical towards his talent.

    (Eeeewwrr, that YouTube video is not accessible from my country. I'm sure that's because of these GEMA nuts again.)

  3. Lydia, if you like rap generally, and can shrug off a bit of casual misogyny in the lyrics (it's sort of endemic in the genre), sure, give him a listen.

  4. As long as we're off topic, I gotta say that a while ago I bought some bone-in veal on close-out. I froze that for a week or so, but last night I took it out to defrost, and today I got an onion, two potatoes, two carrots and a can of tomato juice- brother, I had a STEW going!

  5. Since we're off-topic, I totally either have a million of these roly-poly bugs wandering around my room, or else it's the same one and he is TOTALLY getting around.

    Also, wearing your head reminds me of the people who get their own portrait tattooed on themselves. I once saw a picture of a guy with his own face tattooed on both his forearms. I guess it's easier than getting mirrors surgically inserted into the flesh of your arms ...

  6. Since we're off topic, and since I just discovered this blog yesterday and have been poring over it for more hours than I should, I would like to say I'm amazed both by the MRAs (<-Just learned that acronym, thanks) who keep coming here to make bizarre comments and by David for spending time and energy to respond to their bizarre comments. Are you guys all masochists? I would also like to say that although I've always liked New Order, I must concede that their lyrics are really lame. Did Ian Curtis take all the song-writing talent with him to his early grave? Finally, I would like to say Eliza's story about the guy who tattooed his own face on both arms made me laugh out loud, as did "Why yes, that IS my head. I'm wearing my head."

  7. The "wearing my head" is almost as funny as the guy wearing the T-shirt of himself.

    As for the guy with his tats of himself, I'm sure someone out there WILL at some point attach mirrors to their arms or hands or whatever. Because they're just soooo awesome, y'know? When it comes to egotistical hoopla, there are no bounds!

  8. Sam, did you even think of inviting us over? That sounded yummy! Oh well, last night was awesome enough. I won $500 at the casino. :D

  9. Ok, I'll be the one to point out David's clear elitism here. His expectation that most people know what geese are begs the question. Is he another Kennedy or something? Wouldn't surprise me that family is huge. Get out of your ivory tower, David and join the rest of us here in Lilliput. Tolerate our collective ignorance, Goliath in proportion to your stone cold, rock hard intellectualism, targeting ignorance square in the forehead.

    He knew they weren't ducks, David, he knew...

  10. What, exactly, is 'casual misogyny'? I'm surprised at you, David. Is it less hurtful or frightening since it's just 'casual'? I say it isn't.

    That being said, I actually have Port of Miami, and each time I hear the misogynist parts, I think to myself that Rick Ross is just an ignorant asshole. I actually have pity for him. But, Pots and Pans and Cross That Line are my two favorite tracks, and they're just really well-done. Even then, it can still be triggering sometimes. Weird, I know. I also sometimes listen to The Mentors and Too Short. WTF? On some level I force myself to accept this, and it makes me sad.

  11. @doctressjulia:

    "I'm surprised at you, David. Is it less hurtful or FRIGHTENING since [misogyny in rap music] is just 'casual?'"

    Were you really "frightened" by some music, doctressjulia? Why you delicate flower, you.

    From the Catalog of Anti-Male Shaming Tactics:
    Charge of Endangerment (Code Orange) -- The Elevated Threat Charge

    Discussion: The target is accused of being a menace in some undefined manner. This charge may be coupled with some attempt to censor the target. Examples:

    * "You guys are scary."
    * "You make me feel afraid."

    Response: It may be constructive to point out that only bigots and tyrants are afraid of having the truth expressed to them. One may also ask why some women think they can handle leadership roles if they are so threatened by a man’s legitimate freedom of expression.

    I doubt that David minds being anti-male-shamed by you all that much, Doctress. But I rise to the defense of all men everywhere in calling out and criticizing shaming tactics for the manipulative little weapons that they are.

  12. Julia, I think there is a difference between songs that contain misogyny and songs that basically preach misogyny from start to finish, like, say:

    Or, for that matter:

    Ross' songs are mostly about drugs and money. I don't like the misogyny, but it's not constantly in your face. (I'm not actually a fan of drug-dealing either, for what it's worth; a friend of mine lives in a neighborhood in the middle of a gang war driven by turf battles over drug-selling locations, and actually witnessed a drug-related murder last summer.)

    I also think that there's a big difference between Rick Ross' misogyny and the misogyny of someone who, say, spends much of their free time on a web site devoted to putting down women.

    There is a lot of great music/great art/grast literature, etc, that happens to be put out by people with offensive ideas, or simply assholes. Picasso was a misogynist, but still a great painter.

    All that said, the Mentors!!? I saw them live once (they were opening for another band) and they were pretty much the most virulently misogynistic people I've ever seen. Also, their music sucked. I was glad when the audience started chanting "you suck" at them between every song.

  13. Jesus tapdancing Christ on a cracker, John, don't you have anything better to do?

  14. misogyny is deeply ingrained in men and women in this patriarchy and we express it in different ways. None of us are perfect.

  15. "Jesus tapdancing Christ on a cracker, John, don't you have anything better to do?"

    Your feminist friend David doesn't seem to as he spends day and night looking for a post from an MRA to post up on here.

    There is seriously many other better things to do on the net alone. Then there is the outside world.

  16. "misogyny is deeply ingrained in men and women in this patriarchy"

    What patriarchy?

    I didn't know there is one in American society. Please educate me

  17. Elizabeth, (belated) congrats! What's the url?


    The issue was a lot more boring then they make it out to be. But it is still cool! And then I win money so I no longer have to use some man to pay for my way! *laughs*

  19. Elizabeth

    In the future you will when you lose that money from your gambling addiction.

  20. I make more than you do Nick. I probably make more than everyone else on this blog.

  21. There is seriously many other better things to do on the net alone. Then there is the outside world.

    And yet here you are.

  22. "I make more than you do Nick. I probably make more than everyone else on this blog."

    The militant independent woman speaks.

    The funny thing is about many of these types is that they would never accept a man who earns less than them. Yet they will cry out that men feel intimidated over their status.

  23. nick

    The funny thing is that women in their 20's in cities are making more then their male counterparts, yet the man blogs still try to play the "they want a man to support them" card.

    Do you know any young people? I know you are yourself probaly a young person but it has been my observance that mra types do not have a rich social life and base most of their ideas on second or third hand information from t.v that they will not watch themselves.

    From my observation of real young people the kids are doing alright. It really is just you.

  24. Nick, so either a woman is going to be using some male for support or she is too independent to deign to date a guy who makes less then her.

    In your world-a woman is wrong no matter what she does.

  25. Kave

    "I know you are yourself probaly a young person but it has been my observance that mra types do not have a rich social life"

    Firstly, I don't consider myself an MRA. I am an anti feminist.

    Secondly, what you are saying pretty much speaks for it's self that women are not really the second class citizens. Why? Because it's simply anti-social to talk about male issues. You said it your self! While female issues can be talked about in any place and any time.

    PC favours women and yet, we pretend that women are second class citizens.

    Has anyone got a logical answer against this?

    A man is deemed as a social outcast if...

    1. Expressing the wrong things women do
    2. Expressing the problems men have

    How can a gender be the second class citizens when PC blatantly favours that said gender?


    Wrong again. A man is wrong no matter what he does.

    If he is intimidated by an independent woman, he is wrong.

    If he thinks he is good enough for an independent woman and/or a woman who earns more than him, he is wrong.

    In the dating game, a woman is hardly wrong when it comes to political correctness. Something that a man does that doesn't suit most women is wrong. Something a woman does that doesn't suit most men is politically correct.

  26. You make little sense Nick. But you did manage to convince yourself you are a victim once again. Shall I get you a hanky to wipe up your tears.

  27. "You make little sense Nick. But you did manage to convince yourself you are a victim once again. Shall I get you a hanky to wipe up your tears."

    Haha no thanks I think feminists need one more than me as the total irony is; feminists complain a billion times more than me.

    Feminists are dumbass hypocrites. They think they are entitled to complain all they want at any place and any time. When a man just opens his mouth with one little complaint, he is considered to be a whiner.

    Feminism is a total fail when it comes to being an equality movement

  28. Nick

    Social life = do you have freinds.

    Your answer spoke for itself even though it made little to no sense.

    I suggest you go out and join a soft ball league to start meeting people outside of the internet.

  29. Hey, just thought I'd stop back in to say that I am ALWAYS WRONG!!!! /s

    Yeah, I know- the Mentors?? I just kind of like them. I also like Gwar and Carcass, though, so... hey. No accounting for (my) bad taste, eh? lol

    Yes, David, I know, but... there are some songs where I hear them and I think, "Jeez, if only those two lines about 'grading hoes' or '(insert verb) bitchez' weren't there... this song would be perfect". Sigh. What do ya do...

    David, I think you're awesome and I love your blog. Keep it going!

  30. "Elizabeth said...

    The issue was a lot more boring then they make it out to be. But it is still cool! And then I win money so I no longer have to use some man to pay for my way! *laughs*"

    The link points to a story about the Arizona shooting aftermath. I'm not sure how you win money from that.

  31. Jupiter-Arizona has casinos on the reservations and the shooting portion was only part of it. The other part was about some of the more wacky antics of some of the Republican party activists.

  32. Elizabeth, I think you either linked to the wrong article or that the version of the story that ran online was missing a section on the reservations and/or casinos.

  33. I think people are misunderstanding what I was talking about.

    The article was about the lack of civility in Arizona despite the claims of some of the politicians that they were going to be more civil in their discussions. I was involved in one of the parts of the article and got an unattributed mention (my name was not listed but my job was). That was awesome #1 on Friday.

    The awesome #2 was the fact that in Arizona we have reservations and casinos on those reservations. I went to a casino and won. I made a crack about not needing a man to support me based on the silliness of the idea itself.


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