My Secret Life as a Group of Women

Not that there's anything wrong with that.

One of the weirder pleasures of writing this blog is that, from time to time, as I wend my way across the assorted gathering holes of the manosphere, I discover the natives chattering candidly about little old me, apparently forgetting that I actually read the forums they hang out on. These conversations tend to be a little, well, surreal.

You may vaguely remember The Troll King from a post of mine a couple of weeks back on his brief career as a faux-feminist calling herself the Feminist Troll Queen. I recently found him in the Men’s Rights subreddit on Reddit, trying to defend himself against charges of, well, trolling, and suggesting that some of the subreddit’s resident trolls are “manboobz followers and probably feminists from feministe.” (Not that I know of.) But the strangest thing was this reference to me as a person of indeterminate gender:

I saw him talking about not being able to become pregnant on one of his posts recently about gangbangs and MGTOW and I wouldn't be surprised if it is a female with a male internet persona or maybe a FTM transperson??

Whaaaa? It took me a little while to figure out that he was referring to a dumb joke I made at the tail end of my post about MGTOWers speculating on why some women like porn. Here’s the joke, such as it was:

Now, I’m no evolutionary psych expert, but, er, what exactly is the evolutionary advantage of facials? I’m pretty sure you can’t get pregnant from semen on your forehead, in your eyes  or, say, up your nose. (At least I never have.)

Hey, I didn’t claim it was a good joke. In any case, for anyone confused by it, the idea was to humorously suggest that I was such a frenzied masturbator that I regularly shot semen up my own nose. And that this had never made me pregnant. Not only because the semen was in my nose rather than my vagina but because, you know, I’m a non-transgender dude, and non-trans dudes can't get pregnant. (Also, even if the semen were to get in my vagina I wouldn't get pregnant, because I DON'T HAVE A VAGINA.) (Some trans men can get pregnant, but THEY CAN'T GET PREGNANT FROM SEMEN UP THE NOSE either. NO ONE CAN.)

For the record, I would also like to point out that have never actually shot semen up my nose – or, for that matter, on my forehead or in my eyes.

Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

In any case, Troll King’s confusion about my gender – especially strange, given that he himself had just engaged in a bit of internet cross-dressing by posing as the Feminist Troll Queen -- got me thinking back on one of the more surreal aspects of my domestic violence debate with Paul Elam last fall, which was the assumption on the part of a group of his followers that I was not just a woman, but a whole group of them.

As “Frank” put it:

“David Futrelle” argues like a provocative feminist woman, or perhaps I should put a group of feminist women. 

Note the personal abuse, the petty point scoring, the personalised arguments, and the lack of any real evidence or examination of the issues under discussion.

There is also the (supposedly) witty sarcasms, and the (supposedly) funny rudeness while ignoring hard points backed up real evidence. So typical of the misandrist feminist woman.

“Roderick” concurred:

I suspect the the sarcastically named Manboobz is a group of young ‘educated’ woman.

– note: {Often I have found that mediocre woman always work in groups. Woman who have higher abilities tend to work independently from the protective huddle.} (Who bravely hide from accountability or challenge)

“Alphabeta,” meanwhile, has a slightly different take on it:

I wonder if Futrelle is a woman disguised as a man or perhaps a woman in the making. His/her words have the whirr of the hamster wheel about them.

Remember this?

http://mensnewsdaily.com/2010/04/22/mens-studies-foremost-authority-opts-for-castration-literally/

What right-thinking man advertises his intellectual wares as ‘manboobz’? Sounds like wishful thinking at the very least.

Yes, he's arguing that this blog is called "Man Boobz" because I want some.

I don't, actually.

Not that there's anything wrong with that.

So, once again, to clarify: misogynist dudes, when I refer to “boobz” in the title of this blog I am referring to you. It’s a double entendre. “Boobs,” yes, can refer to breasts. But “boob” can also mean “an ignorant or foolish person.” Do you see where I’m going with this? YOU GUYS ARE MEN, AND YOU ALSO ARE BOOBS. The “Boobz” in “Man Boobz” ARE YOU.

She's my sister... She's my daughter... My sister, my daughter.  She's my sister AND my daughter!

Oh dear. I got carried away.

I should probably explain that the last bit there was from Chinatown. I do not have a sister who is also a daughter. Evelyn Mulwray does. But she’s not a real person.



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Alone Again, Naturally

Choose "none of the above."

The blog A(n)nals of Online Dating is, like a lot of things involving online dating, both hilarious and horrifying at the same time. The blog catalogs the highly ineffective habits of the most clueless and/or offensive would-be romancers online. I’m sure there are terrible female daters out there as well, but the blog mostly focuses on the dudes, many of whom are not entirely dissimilar from the sorts of guys I write about here all the time: angry, undersocialized misogynists who desire women (or at least their vaginas) as much as they hate and fear them. Luckily for the women of the online dating world, most of these men make their odiousness so plain that it is unlikely they will ever score even a single date.

Here are a few of my recent favorites.

Bachelor Number One I’ll call the Master Debater. He sent the following missive to at least one woman online, hoping, apparently, to spark a little discussion, and perhaps a little romance: 

I love to debate. I feel that Im very good at it. I see the Feminist Movement as a CIA funded political agitation mechanism. Many men feel that the Feminist Movement is anti-male, but I feel that its anti everybody. It hurts everyone that comes into contact with it.

My question to you is, would you be able to offer a rebuttal to what I just asserted without resorting to personal attack 

Able, or willing? I think any number of potential respondents would be more than able to offer a critique without resorting to namecalling. But what would be the fun of that?

Let’s move on to Bachelor Number Two, a guy I’ll call Mr. Optimistic, a fellow who actually thinks he can cajole twentysomething women into having hot sex with him by, among other things, suggesting that women over 31 are unfuckable monsters. (Hint: With  few exceptions, women under 31 will eventually be women over 31.) In his dating profile, Mr. O explains that ladies messaging him should be: 

reasonably tall …  passionate and intelligent so as to be good company, sexually liberated, and attractive - really attractive, fat chics need not apply (hehe, I’m so self-amusing). 

Evidently they need not be sticklers for correct spelling or grammar. Mr. O goes on to explain that he wants a woman who earns her own living, but doesn’t mind him bossing her around. As he puts it, he wants someone: 

Capable of holding a steady job but without making it your #1 priority - since it could interfere with our sexual activities. …  If you can accept that I’m responsible for taking charge and my decisions will be final, don’t take yourself too seriously and thinks the world of me.

He wants a gal who is family oriented, but open to threesomes:

Family oriented but not anytime soon … open to spontaneous sexual activities (you know, outdoors sex, the odd 3-some with a cutie we pick up somewhere or one of your girlfriends), likes the outdoors (nudity optional), and doesn’t complain when I go fishing with the guys.

And she can’t be in a hurry about the whole family thing. After all, he wants a few good years of fucking before his wife hits the age of 31 – what he says is “the expiration date for most women anyway.”  She should be: 

ready to have children only after 30 and proving yourself to be a faithful wife and a loving woman, prepared for the duties of a good mother, have class and know when it’s time to speak up and when it’s NOT the time to do so, instead of a stuck-up naggy b!tch who can’t shut up, sociable, know how to please the sexual drive of your partner (little things such as giving me a call when you’ve gotten a new set of sexy lingerie to surprise me), and know that gifts are little treats and rewards, and not a never-ending desire to be pampered.

 '

Interesting how quickly his disquisition on family values turns into kvetching about "naggy b!tch[es]" and then, just as quickly, into the tritest of sexual fantasies. In any case, he explains, while she should be willing to spend money on lingerie, she should otherwise be a thrifty sort with

good spending habits, no ridiculous credit card debts and a sense of home economy; I’m not planning on changing my excellent lifestyle, and I plant to eventually be able to give my children an excellent education - and that’s not possible without good savings and planning. This will also help teaching them to earn their own achievements, respect their parents, and not be spoiled brats.

Also, no pets:

You should also understand that pets are simple money pits that only serve as something lonely women occupy themselves with so that they don’t have to connect with their husbands.

But hey, he’s not picky:

I’m attracted to all kinds of women, redheads, brunettes, black, white, latinas, you name it, as long as they’re attractive. Not attracted to fat women, and that includes the infamous “curvy” (a word that used to mean actual curves, not fat), and “a few extra pounds,” regardless of your supposed “inner beauty.” Sorry :)

The final smiley really nails it for me. If I were a woman – and a few years younger, and not so fat, and bisexual, and into outdoor sex, and both debt- and pet-free, and willing to put my life into the hands of a guy who can’t spell the word “chick” -- I’m sure I’d be begging the guy for a date.

No mystery, these guys.

It’s hard to compete with Mr. Optimistic here, but Bachelor Number Three, the guy I’ll call No Beefcake, comes pretty close. His strategy for winning over the ladies? Ranting about how women on Plenty of Fish are a bunch of delusional fatties.  

I can honestly say the selection on here is mostly scary to me. I have no problem with single moms or girls that are other than stick thin. But for real, if you are gargantuan and just gross … please don’t waste your time with me. 

I'm no beefcake but I am healthy and I am getting tired of creepy girls wondering “where all the good men are” when its clear that they have either been eaten by those same girls, or are in hiding for fear of being mistaken for a 7-11 corndog. I am not Arnie, nor would I want to be but I do have biceps and a fairly flat stomach, if you have a massive muffin-top and can’t take care of yourself why set yourself up by hiding behind deceptive photo angles? Just because you have cleavage does not mean you have nice boobs. We’re gonna find out eventually, why lie now? Every woman’s profile says they demand “honesty”, how many actually offer it? Self delusion is not attractive, except to the worst quality guys.

Biceps, a “fairly flat stomach,” a raging hostility towards women. Is that all this fellow has to offer? Not by a long shot! Did we mention that he owns his own home?

I am a homeowner with a couple of promising careers, a well developed intellect, a decent body and a serious disdain for drama, game playing and bullshit. Therefore I do not feel the need to “capture your attention” with something artificially witty and intriguing. How about you show me that you have what it takes to hold an intelligent conversation for ten minutes, or that you actually care about your future, and could be entertaining and fun for me as well?

So, do you have what it takes to hold an interesting conversation with No Beefcake? Possible topics include: 

1) home ownership and why it is the backbone of the American Dream 

2) why so many women are fat fatties. 

The ball’s in your court, ladies.

PS: Here's the Gilbert O'Sullivan song that I stole my title from.

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MGTOW: Myth and reality

Today, two videos.

The first, how Men Going Their Own Way see themselves. (Indeed, I found the video on MGTOWforums.com, billed as "MGTOW explained in 33 seconds ... .")

The second presents what I think is probably a much more accurate picture of the typical MGTOWer.





I know, cheap shot. Did I ever say I was above cheap shots?

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Angels and Insects

 

Manosphere dudes devote a fuckwad of time to denouncing the evils of modern marriage. But if anything they drastically understate their case. A recent post on io9 took a look at an old Superman comic that faced the issue no one wants to talk about: What if your lovely bride turns into a giant bug and stings you to death!!?? 

 

Also, Happy Easter! 

 

As for me, I celebrate Easter a day late. Well, it’s not so much Easter that I celebrate as Leftover Easter Candy for 50% Off Day.  

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On The Spearhead, demanding child support is a "provocation," and beating a woman's face in is "justice."

A little over a week ago, a Florida man in the midst of a divorce hearing, apparently upset that he would have to pay child support, reportedly snapped and brutally attacked his wife, leaving her, as one account of the incident notes, “with two black eyes, broken facial bones and split lips.” (You can see the extent of her injuries here.) He’s now being held on felony battery charges. The woman had previously tried to get a restraining order against her husband, but apparently couldn’t convince the court he was dangerous enough to warrant it.

On The Spearhead, sadly but unsurprisingly, it’s the alleged attacker, Paul Gonzalez, who is getting the sympathy. W.F. Price, the site’s head honcho, weighed in on the subject yesterday. In his mind, apparently, the demand that Gonzalez actually provide some financial support for his two children was a provocation of sorts, which led him, as a Marine veteran, to “react ... as warriors sometimes do in response to provocation — violently.”

At this point, we know very few details about the case. But that didn’t stop Price from opining confidently on what he imagines are injustices perpetrated against the poor alleged attacker:

What likely happened in that courtroom is that Gonzalez, representing himself, got the shaft. … We don’t know what the child support order was, but it was probably pretty hefty (as usual), and the visitation quite meager. Add to that the fact that his wife was already living with another man, despite having so recently given birth to Mr. Gonzalez’s daughter, and the situation must have seemed absolutely upside-down to the former marine. It was upside down. His wife is obviously a little tramp who has no problem swinging from one dick to another even while raising two babies, and there she was about to get rewarded with an upgrade in lifestyle while the chump father loses his kids and wallet. That’s why Mr. Gonzalez lost it. 

Price does acknowledge, in a cursory way, that “beating your wife is always a bad idea” -- though he seems less bothered by the beating than by the fact that in this case the divorcing wife “gets to go on camera making herself out to be a poor, innocent little victim. I highly doubt this woman is innocent.”

The commenters to Price’s article rallied around the alleged attacker. In a comment that got three times as many upvotes as downvotes from Spearhead readers, Greyghost celebrated Gonzalez as something of a hero:

I need to send that guy a prison christmas package. He was getting screwed and struck out. To bad he never heard of the spearhead. If about 10 to 15 percent of crapped on fathers did this kind of thing with some murders mixed in there the talk about fathers would sound a lot like the talk when the subject is islam.

 Piercedhead offered this take:

Gonzalez may well have been overwhelmed by the realization that being innocent of all his wife’s false accusations made little difference to this fate – he still got treated as if he was worthless. In that case, might as well match the penalty with the appropriate deed… 

If the courts won’t dispense justice, someone else will – it’s a law of nature.

That’s right: bashing a woman’s face in is a kind of “justice.” Naturally enough, this being The Spearhead, this comment garnered (at last count) 56 upvotes from readers, and only 2 downvotes. 

Mananon, meanwhile, suggested that the alleged attack had:

something to do with a warrior’s instinct for dignified self-reliance. … Strip a man of his dignity and what else is there left?

DCM, even more bluntly, described Gonzalez as:

a brave man and a hero. 

There will be more and more of these incidents and it will be a long time before women are seen as responsible for them — which they are. …

It will be men who can’t take it any more who will ignite change.

Peter-Andrew: Nolan(c) -- yes, that's how he writes his name -- took it a step further, saying that: 

the only bit I feel sorry about is that he did not arrange to have someone else kill her such that his chances of being caught were minimal. By doing this in the middle of the court he will be put in a cage for a long, long time. And he does not deserve to be there. HE is the VICTIM.

Every one of these quotes, with the exception of Nolan’s, garnered at least a dozen upvotes from Spearhead readers. (Nolan's comment so far has gotten no upvotes or downvotes.)

What sort of comment on this case will get you downvoted by the Spearheaders? One like this:

Wow! Nothing justifies violence. I wonder who will care for the baby while the mother recovers. Or doesn’t that matter? 

What a coward. Mad at the judge, goes after a woman. 

Actually advocating murder, no sweat. Suggesting that violence is wrong and worrying about the welfare of the children, outrageous!

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Virtual Women, Real Annoying

Probably not the woman of your dreams.

Hey fellas! Are you tired of dealing with actual women? Would you rather spend a nice evening at home chatting amiably with a tiny virtual woman who lives inside your computer instead? If so, would it be OK if instead of resembling any woman you’ve ever met in real life this tiny virtual woman instead acted as though she’d been designed by some dude who’s never actually spoken with a real woman? 

Also, I should add, if you chat her up cleverly enough, she’ll take off her virtual clothes and show you her virtual lady bits. 

If this all sounds like heaven to you, you may want to check out a little “game” called Virtual Woman Millennium Edition. A friend of mine found it on Download.com theother day, and naturally thought of me. The game, such as it is, allows you to create the woman of your dreams. As the game publisher, an outfit calling itself CyberPunk Software, put it: 

Virtual Woman users can build, talk, and compete against Virtual Women with full artificial intelligence. You choose their ethnic type, personality, location, clothing, etc

By “compete against,” the game makers mean, basically, that you chat with her until she either tells you to fuck off (you lose!) or she takes off her clothes (you win!). Sex, evidently, is something that women own, and the point of dating, for guys at least, is to sweet talk – or wheedle, or con -- the ladies into giving it to them. Women “win,” by contrast, when they force guys to listen to their inane blather without giving the poor schmucks even a glimpse of their titties. (I’d like to think that when my dates take off their clothes we both win.) 

I played the game the other night – or at least as much of it as I could stand. The first time, the game crashed before the conversation started. The second time, I played as a raging misogynist and offended my date by calling her a “whore” and a “cunt,” and she left in a huff. The third time, I chatted long enough to convince my date to remove her top. At which point real life asserted its demands, and I set the game aside, never to resume it.

Let’s just say that the conversations I had with each of these imaginary women were something less than sparkling. The woman who eventually took off her top blathered happily away about her hair for a few minutes, then segued into a conversation about how she hated going to new supermarkets because she wouldn’t know where to look to find the milk. She was shallow, silly, and self-absorbed, a virtual incarnation of every sexist stereotype of modern womanhood.  In other words, she seemed to come straight from MGTOW central casting. My “conversation” with her only lasted a few minutes, but it seemed to take forever. If real women were like this, I think even I would consider Going My Own Way. 

As one review on Download.com put it:  

the girls are just plane stupid, they … keep repeating themselves over and over again, and allot of what they say makes no sense, I say something to them, and they asked me some silly question that makes no sense, once I said what to one about something stupid it said that made so sense, just to see what it would do, and it said ( why are you so worried about me being what?) and it did that with other things I said to it too, its stupid, don't waist your time with this. 

That pretty much hits the nale on the hed. 

So many questions:

Were the makers of this game deliberately trying to make the women as annoying as possible, or do they think women are actually like this? Was the inanity of the conversation a bug – the result of shitty artificial intelligence programming  – or a feature? Probably a bit of both. 

More to the point: who could possibly enjoy a game like this? You’d have to have a pretty low opinion of women to be able to put up with the game’s casual misogyny. But if you hate women that much, why would you want to spend your evening talking to an imaginary woman about shopping and hair? 

Perhaps that’s why the publisher seems to have abandoned the game; the latest update on its web site is from 2008. 

As I’ve pointed out before, a small but significant number of “mansosphere” men are eagerly looking forward to the day when sex robots and/or “virtual” women will give men what they see as a real alternative to real women, thus putting supposedly spoiled “western” women in their place and destroying feminism to boot. One of the many fatal flaws in this scenario is that the only people who seem to be interested in making sexbots and VR women are guys who have no fucking clue what actual human women are like. But, hey, if it gets these guys out of the dating pool, that’s pretty much good news for everyone.

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Men Who Hate Women, and the Women Who Love ... Porn

Cats also love porn.

So the guys over at MGTOWforums.com – who want nothing to do with women but somehow can’t stop talking about them all day every day – have some interesting theories on why some women like porn so much, sometimes to the point of addiction. 

According to the aptly named womanhater, it’s because they’re picking up tips; apparently, the better women fuck, the better they can fuck guys over:

Women (a few exceptions aside) see sex the same way a lumberjack sees a chainsaw - a useful tool. If they're 'addicted' to it then my guess is that they're in fact just studying it because they know it is their competition and they'd better learn how to do it like the men they hope to manipulate and extort want it. It's like any other form of physical performance - you get better by watching the professionals. There's not a man among us whose swing wouldn't improve if we spent several hours a day watching professional golfers.

True, at least that bit about golf. Based on my admittedly limited exposure to her work, I’m not sure that all the skills that one can learn from watching Sasha Grey necessarily translate all that well to non-gang-bang situations.

Zuberi, meanwhile, suspects that women watch porn just to spite men:

Are they really addicted to porn or are they desperately trying to keep up with the sheer number of men who watch porn? Are these harpies so insecure that they have to overtake men in everything? It's pathetic. There's already a number of women who are drinking themselves retarded trying to keep up with men that they think are power drinkers.

But are they really watching all the porn they say they’re watching? Shade47 is suspicious:

When women look at porn they see pixels on a screen. Just some more attention whoring from women looking for a new angle to reel men in.

Almsot every trashy girl Ive met claims to be into porn but when you look at her internet history its all retarded girl games on flash websites and shit. You know they arent covering their tracks by deleting browser history because that would involve understanding computers.

Damn these computer-illiterate, flash-game-loving, only-pretending-to-like-porn slatterns!

AC101202, by contrast, is convinced that a lot of women actually do love porn, or at least the more nasty and degrading parts of it – “facials, ass in the air, DP etc.” Why? Evolutionary Psych 101, dude!  Because their reptilian cave-lady brains just love gangbangs: 

Pre-civilization, women thousands of years ago spent their days getting nailed by dozens of guys. We all know here a majority of women have rape fantasies …

Women who are managers, in positions of power, probably get off most watching degrading actions performed on women. Their lower reptilian brain likes seeing women treated like sex objects, since the women who reproduced best were the one's who learned to enjoy gangbanging.

Now, I’m no evolutionary psych expert, but, er, what exactly is the evolutionary advantage of facials? I’m pretty sure you can’t get pregnant from semen on your forehead, in your eyes  or, say, up your nose. (At least I never have.) Perhaps someone better schooled in evo psych and the general evil of women could explain that to me.

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The Ladies Auxiliary of the Ladyhaters Club

Women in groups: Always trouble.

One of the strangest places in the burly world of Men’s Rightsers and MGTOWers is The Spearhead’s Shieldmaidens forum. And no, I am not making that name up. It’s a forum, essentially, for women interested in being a sort of Women’s Auxiliary to a bunch of guys who are all about hating women.

Given that such a role – trying to help dudes who don’t much like you or your whole gender -- is a bit of a tricky one, the forum moderator Hestia has written a long introductory post explaining just what new gals should and shouldn’t do to support their menfolk. It’s kind of a masterpiece of doublespeak.  Let’s look at some of its highlights.

Hestia starts out by warning the ladies that these rough men sometimes talk in a rough manner:

As this is a male environment, us girls can expect styles of communication that we might not use ourselves or readily relate to. For the purpose of this post, I will call all of this "locker room talk". … Topics and expressions women may find crude are likely to occur and generalizations about women (or white, western, whatever) used to adequately get a point across. These differences, while bothersome to some women, are not wrong in and of themselves and are not reason to shame men into expressing themselves differently. As women in the locker room, we are the ones who need to look the other [way] and make accommodations; not the men for whom this website is for.

In other words: the guys here may call you sluts and whores and worse, but really, that’s your fault for being here in the first place, so don’t complain.

Welcome aboard!

Hestia continues:

We must also respect this place as one of the few politically incorrect sanctuaries that men have in today's misandrist world. … We should not be bullying men into saying, "yes, indeed not all women are like that!" to appease our own egos. … This is sacred male friendly ground and should be treated as such. … We are but guests on this website and must know our place and respect certain boundaries for the sake of the men here and for the work towards gender peace.

Hard to be more abject than this. So how have the menfolk responded?

It appears that not too many men actually read the Shieldmaidens forum, but among those who do, the reaction has been a little less than enthusiastic. Our friend GlobalMan, one of the more excitable Spearhead regulars, basically tells her (and all women) to fuck off entirely:

I have voiced my opinion many times women should be banned all together from here. They are contributing nothing and they are taking up a lot of time and energy of the stupid young men who do not realise that women are just attention whores who won't actually do anything at the end of the day. ….

You women pretty much fuck up everything you stick your nose into. And you never, ever tire of fucking things up for men under the delusion you have 'something to contribute'. You don't. Get over it. You pop out babies. That is your one and only 'claim to fame' and it used to be enough for a man to love a woman for her whole life and to provide for her and the kids. Now it is not. So you women need to 'act like men' and suck it up.

Indeed. If women had any class at all you would leave of your own accord and let the men sort out what you refused to. The only posts from women here should be 'Men, please tell us what to do'.

A fellow calling himself Diogenes offers his two cents:

That Hestia has to write this thread proves that indeed women who come to this board do exactly that which she complains against. They have such a cozy and male-coddled life that they are shocked when some men rightly express their scorn and foul language towards their attitudes and manipulative behaviour. Women BREED misogyny because all they do is constantly manipulate and get the attention and protection of men by trying to look sexy all the time. Every time a man turns his head towards a pretty lady, she knows she is being looked after and will be rescued by a man if ever her poor little ass does something stupid. They are CHILDREN at heart. One female college student mentioned to me how according to her "every girl" has gone on dates just to get free dinners. How much more proof do we need that women are NO GOOD WHORES?

I guess that’s some of the "locker room talk" Hestia was warning the ladies about.

Granted, it's been awhile since I've seen the inside of a locker room, but I don't remember much of the talk in the locker rooms I've been in revolving around the no-good whorishness of all women. I think that might be because most men are not in fact hateful assholes who think all women are NO GOOD WHORES.That's just a theory though.

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Something Awful visits The Spearhead Forum

 

This weekend, Something Awful gives its readers a little tour of The Spearhead Forum and some of its more colorful fauna. I've borrowed the screenshot above from them. Hagslave entrainment! Yeasty oblivion!

The Spearhead Forum is if anything a little weirder than The Spearhead itself. It is also the main stomping ground of a fellow named Zebert, who has many, well, innovative ideas about how to solve all the problems of the world (e.g. forbidding education for women, prohibiting gatherings of more than four women at a time, removing the voiceboxes from baby girls at birth).

The Something Awful folks have gathered up quite a few of his most intriguing posts, and many others of equal value. Head over there now and enjoy.